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Wonders of Wellbeing by Charlotte

Welcome to our brand new All of Us blog series – articles written entirely by and for estranged and care experienced students on community topics that you want to hear about. *Hands the mic over*
 
Hi, I’m Charlotte and I live in the North of England. I am in the final year of my Sociology degree. I love being surrounded by nature, listening to music and my favourite dessert is a chocolate brownie! This month is Family Estrangement Awareness Month and National Care Leaver Month and I wanted to write a bit about wellbeing, and how I’ve tried to look after mine as an estranged student.

What’s wellbeing got to do with it?

My experience of being an estranged student over the last seven years has been three words – chaotic, joyful and busy. Sometimes, I have felt overwhelmed. Although, higher education has been some of the best years of my life (it has opened opportunities that I would often dream of!); equally at times, it has come with it’s stressors – I’m sure your reading this blog yourself as an estranged or care experienced student and thinking: “how did I manage to meet that deadline!?” or “what task do I start with first?” A mixture of this has had an impact on my wellbeing. When seeking emotional support from friends, they would always talk about the importance of looking after my mental health and wellbeing. While listening to their advice was great, I would find myself often so caught up in the chaos, yet feeling like Tina Turner and thinking: “what’s wellbeing got to do with it?”

Learning to love

Overtime, I have learnt the importance of taking a step back and loving myself as an estranged student. Looking after my wellbeing is no longer a ‘tick in the box exercise,’ it is a priority. I wanted to use this blog to inspire you if you have ever had that: ‘this is too much for me’ moment. I found three techniques that have worked for me really well.

Walking in nature is a great way to release stress and can help with things like processing trauma. I often take in my surroundings and ensure I live in the moment. During my walks (usually in my local park or reservoir), I love taking photos of trees, listening to the birds sing and the sounds of water. I often find that people will stop and say “hello” – this really helps with my social wellbeing too! If you find yourself needing to take a study break, a fifteen-minute walk, even if it’s on campus can really help you to de-stress and focus on your studies.

(Image: Photo taken on my walks to a local reservoir and park)
 
Secondly, joining societies and clubs is great for your mental health and wellbeing.  It is also a great way to meet people and become part of a community, and build your own local peer support network. At my university, I joined a society that has various activities – including watching movies with lots of free snacks (such as popcorn, one of my favourites!) which is a bonus. I have also looked into ways that I can do activities I enjoy in my local area. This is a craft session where I created a paper flower at a local women’s group. I added a yellow button for a pop of colour!

(Image: Photo of a paper flower created by hand)

Finally, I invest time into reading self help books. If I have a negative thought, I am learning more about tools and coping strategies. Reading around mental health and wellbeing has been really beneficial for me because I now take breaks when I need them and reward myself when I have met a deadline. I also find that it helps to watch YouTube videos, podcasts and TED Talks.

 
You can too!

Being estranged or care experienced comes with it’s challenges. It’s easy to forget ourselves. I really hope these small changes can be used by you too. Be kind to yourself, know that you are important and remember to check in with yourself. I will leave you with one of my favourite quotes (also a great positive affirmation!): “Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Christopher Robin from Winnie the Pooh.

Thank you for reading, I hope this helps make you feel less alone in your own wellbeing journey! By Charlotte.

(Image: Photo taken on my walks to a local reservoir and park)

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There are several advocacy and support lines out there for care experienced and estranged students.